My Life My Words

Now or never!

2009-09-24T05:36:00.000-07:00

Loving you is the best thing that have happen to me!

Missing you is the worst thing in my life!

Looking at you from a far away place is already the best thing you haven given me!

look in to your eyes...really gives me the nervs...

But I like it! I really do!

Everything is going crazy between us!

But as long as our love is together.

I will wait!

Maybe you have noticed, but then...

I still am very scared that you will hurt me....

But then I know you will have your reason....

Iwill understand!

Hope that you can really confess to me...

Because...

After next year, it will be a bye bye for me to Hin Hua, my classmates, teachers, freinds

and you...

Really wish that you could understand my feelings....

Forever & always.....

It's time....

2009-09-19T08:06:00.000-07:00

meeting you is the best thing that has ever happen in my life...

but leaving you is the worst thing that will happen....

i can't stand holding on like this....

even if you have....

i can't stand of crying while im thinking of you....

it really hurts....

i heard someone was shouting that you love me.....

when i heard it.....

i just feel like crying....

i really don't understand...

why will you take love as a joke....

maybe i don't understand...

but i really can't help myself for believing those words...

i know it will never be true....

so i will let go....

i willl....

till the time comes....

i will not be in front of you anymore.....

i promise...

it has reach an end...

2009-09-12T22:20:00.000-07:00

sorry my frens...but i really cant stand the hurt anymore....it reli kills me....i cant do it anymore....i need to be free....becuz of a guy....i hurt myself so much....he dont even know hu am i ....how am i goig to tell him what i reli feel......the one will come soon...but not now....becuz i'm hurt....and i'm hurt badly....

boriing holidays!!!!!

2009-08-28T07:20:00.000-07:00

everybody is complaining about boring holidays.....
well....
u can find sumthing that u like to do with it...
like helping out with ur mum with the house chores....
or u can go for a walk with ur dog....(if u have 1)
maybe u could clean up ur room.....
or if u have homework....
then finished it....
don't wait till the last minute then u figure out what to do....
then it will be too late.....
try not to let go everything.....
every hour.....
every minute.....
every second.....
hehe....well.....thats my advice.....
u can always drop a commet to tell me what we can do....
well....
my holiday suckz too.....
not really....i got a lot of free time to finish all my stuff that is incomplete....
learn a new piano song....
try cooking with the new recipe book.....(fail in the end)
well....its kinda fun to have holiday....hehe^^

I can't hold on to it anymore.....

2009-08-19T02:54:00.000-07:00

I wish that i could....but then again...
i know where is my place....
i have to go....
i really can't stand those pressure holding on me anymore....
i just wish some1 could save me....
i really want to let go everything....
y cant they just let me go....i'm not a study type...
please...understand my feelings....
i cant hold on to it any longer....
i'm gonna crash very soon....
what you wan me to do....
i cant do anything but just looking myself falling down to the big deep sea...
anybody...
please...
help me!!

The feelings just comes out naturally...

2009-08-18T01:09:00.000-07:00

What's your feeling after the exam?
Happy?Sad?Nervous?Curious?Excited?
What bout my feelings...
What can i do...
the result came out today....
it was bad...
it was the worst of all...
i cannot believe i would actually get a 42.5% when i studied my Chinese so hard....
i studied until i was pissed off....
and yet...
not even a 50%
what is happening to me....
Who can tell me the answer....
i wish to know it...
Why?
if crying could let my feelings be more comfortable....
i wiish i could cry the whole day...
but not just that short 40 minutes...
all i want is just to pass my own ranking....
but in the end...
i lost to a guy that was lower marks than me....
how could i face this problem myself....
please...
tell me what to do....

PISSED OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-08-13T05:54:00.000-07:00

i hate my hand!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i hate my fingers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
why cant they just play the key that should be played....
what happen to my hand.....
everytime i play the piano....
it hurts alot....
i cant turn my fingers correctly....
i cant turn my hand correctly....
what happen!!!!!!
i cant evern turn my wrist.....
what the heck happen to my both hands.....
i did nothing wrong.....
you noe piano is my life.....
i will not give up to play piano....
even know i hand is injured....
i wont care bout it....
i just cant bare to listen to ppl playing the songs that i wanted to play....
but i cant...
just becuz of my hand....
i will not let that happen....
NEVER!!!!!!!!!!!!

EXAMS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-08-10T07:41:00.001-07:00

haiz.....exam is 2moro...
and i haven even prepared yet....gosh....
so gonna die.....
hope that somebody could help me.....
arh.....

ur not wearig ur specs 2day.....
haha...
so cute^^

^^...glad to be your friend...

2009-08-08T09:05:00.000-07:00

knowing you is such a fun thing...i can't bare to just talking to you on the phone....
but have to control....haiz....phone bill getting higher is a bad thing.....haha....hope that you will understand....
but your auch a nice guy.....
maybe you will think that i'm too open....
but i want to tell you....
that i'm also a girl....
i know how to control myself.....
gosh....
i think you don't understand....
i will be your best friend...thatz the only thing you need to know....^^
having you as my friend.....
makes me feel so much better...
i really can let him go now...
coz you make me forget bout him....
you make me feel happy again...
you make me feel free...
feel so nice...
i like the feeling when i'm with you.....
but please don't misunderstand....
i still like the feelings when i'm with you as my friend...^^
love you....muaxx....

Welcome to my heart^_^

2009-08-05T06:10:00.001-07:00

i have the best recess ever!!!!!
OMG....i actually knocked him....
althought by that time i dint know he was behind me....
and i was playing with my frens.....
but he was actually laughing....
that is the best thing that ever happened to me....
he was listening to me speaking bahasa indon with my indonesian frens....
and the smile of his is the brightess thing i ever seen.....
haha....
i will never forget that....

you are mine now.....hehehe.....=]

如果我变成你的回忆

2009-07-27T07:55:00.000-07:00

听说。。。
当一个人变成另一个人的回忆时。。。
是一件很痛苦的事。。。
我会变成你的回忆吗？
没有人可以回答我的问题。。。
真的没有解答地方法吗？
好想变成你的美好回忆。。。
可以吗？
美好回忆。。。
对你来说会很难吗？
我。。。可以吗？

..

2009-07-23T01:35:00.000-07:00

gosh....
phone credit went up to 200++
gosh...dam high...
1st time in life man...
dono wat to say
my mind is blank now...
oni noe that i will kena scolding from dad...
but how i gonna say bout it...
his in singapure...
#*^%&
so gonna get killed...
wish that i could get sum help

Never again....

2009-07-16T02:20:00.001-07:00

never will....
ever again....
thinking of u....
is killing my heart....
saw the incident....
hatred is coming out from deep within me...
i cant breathe when i saw u....
cant smile when i saw u...
cant even eat when i saw u....
with u in my life is like a stone crashing on my head...
never again...
letting u go...
will always be the right choice for me...
wish that u could be happy when u r wif her...
i will always wish u...
happy always...

Study!!!!

2009-07-15T07:08:00.000-07:00

STUDY STUDY STUDY!!!!!!!!!!
EXAM EXAM EXAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
have to study ady
haiz...
exam coming so soon
how i wish i can turn bak the time...
so i will have much more time to study all the subjects that i am weak at...
but nvm...
if i study now is still not late...
i noe i can do it....
I CAN DO IT.....
swt...
siao po on blogXP

MOODY

2009-07-14T02:53:00.000-07:00

do i always have to be in this kind of condition....
haiz...
always that moody....
daddy went to indonesia....haiz
missing him now...
saw him in the school 2day...
he dint look at me at all...
maybe...
jz maybe....
there will never be the word "chance" for me with ___
haiz...
really sad n moody...
i hate this feeling==
just wish that i could find sumbody to talk bout this...
really need a boy-friend to talk bout this...
haiz...
really tired of this feelings...
maybe it is...
the time for me...
to just....
forget....
everything...
bout the past of me & him....
i will...
and i hope he will be happy...

Happy^^

2009-07-13T07:44:00.000-07:00

haha....
yesterday nite was a crazy nite....
i was chatting wif my fren on msn....thn suddenly thought of playing a game wif all my frens...
i ask them if they wanted to play it wif me....
they say it will be fun to play wif me....
hehe....
we played prank call to all the frens we noe...
using our house phone....
but of course...
I'm not that stupid...
i dint call anyone...
i was looking at their webcam n see hu they call....
haha
they were so funny...
becuz they wan to see if i did call my frens...
so i on my web cam too...
but i off my phone
so i lied to them n say my phone low battery...
haha
and they actually believe...
i was so happy looking at them calling each other n prank calling their own frens...
they actually told me that we should play dis game more often...
coz they all were so bored n they always complains wat can they do at home...
haha...
i was quiet smart to let them play dis game...
but i cant believe that they were actually crazy till they call me...
GOSH!!!
they ask me n say...
[i thought u say ur phone no battery....]
[ya...i am charging it now]
[oic....well,why dun u join us?]
[no thx...my phone no credit]
[har...i send sum money to u la....we play 2gether...]
[dun wan la....very late ady...dun play so long k?]
[ok....gudnite...sweet dreams...dun let the bed bugs bite...muaxx]
[ok...nitez...muaxx]
OMG...
i cant believe i lied to my frens...
after they read my blog they are so going to kill me....
haiz...
but nvm...
althought i off my webcam...but they dint notice that i dint sign out...
i was actually looking at them...
haha...
but in the end...i still hav to go n slip...
so i off my com n went to slip....

SLIPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-07-11T19:56:00.000-07:00

cant sleep....cant eat.....
all i know is thinking of him....XP
no la...
of course still got other stuff de....
haiz...
really wish that i could go bak to school to study now...
jz wish that sum 1 can brain wash me
let me forget bout the unhappy stuff.....
haiz.....

Am i still myself

2009-07-11T04:39:00.000-07:00

saw him....heard him...looking at him...
haiz....
really tired of all this stuff....
really feel like letting all this stuff go...
haiz...
maybe my fren is ryte....
his not the one....
maybe i should let go....
maybe....jz maybe....
i can over come....
this situation.....

SADNESS ALL THE WAY

2009-07-10T08:09:00.000-07:00

saw him yesterday....
he look so tired...
so stress...
really wan to giv him a pad on his back....
1500m...
such a long way...
i jz cant bare to see him running so hard jz to get that goal...
really wish that his ok....

1st time on blog

2009-05-08T21:42:00.000-07:00

hi....this is my 1st time on blog...haha...dam funny ryte...

sometimes....blogging is much more fun than i ever thought...i can just tell out everything i want to...so...hope to type more secrets in here...bye...chaoz